Ponderance

(May 2003 - March 2007.) Tama's thoughts on the blogosphere, podcasting, popular culture, digital media and citizen journalism posted from a laptop computer somewhere in Perth's isolated, miniature, urban jungle ...

The Jack Bauer Guide for Early Career Academics

Tuesday, August 30, 2005
As a comical interlude in a rather serious CSAA list discussion, Terry Flew posted the following 24-inspired guide which I found rather amusing:
THE JACK BAUER GUIDE TO SURVIVAL AS AN EARLY CAREER ACADEMIC

1. Don't sleep;

2. Don't eat. Drug use only permitted when working undercover or undertaking ethnographic fieldwork;

3. Find out what a computer does between when you press the On button and when Cntl+Alt+Del comes up. You may not prevent a nuclear meltdown (as Jack did 2 weeks ago), but you will impress your IT staff enough for them to pay some attention to your requests to get the computer fixed;

4. If you print any material, get it off the printer ASAP. Under no circumstances leave it for your Dean, Head of School or Centre Director to find;

5. If you have an ex who is an Early Career Academic, keep a close check on their movements (This is doubly important if they are a Senior Academic). If your ex commences work at your School or Centre, they will almost certainly be an agent of your enemies, so you may have to kill them.
Who says that popular culture can't inform your life? ;)

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